Today we’d like to introduce you to Viktoriya Magid.
Hi Viktoriya, it’s an honor to have you on the platform. Thanks for taking the time to share your story with us – to start maybe you can share some of your backstory with our readers?
It’s hard to pinpoint when I knew I wanted to be a psychologist. Born in Ukraine, and having attended and graduated high school from Moscow in 1997, I was no stranger to challenges and trepidations of growing up in an economically and politically stressed society of the 80’s and 90’s, back then known as the USSR. The echoes of World War II were still visible in the plentiful monuments, annual Victory Day celebrations, and numerous graves throughout the country. Stalin’s repressions were just around the corner, and my grandmother still wouldn’t laugh at political jokes and would tell me to be quiet if I made fun of the president or made light of some political holiday. She would tell me not to wear boots because they reminded her of the Nazis and she always keep as equivalent of 50 pounds of salt and sugar stored in her pantry, along with enough food to last a family for weeks if not months.
But the wind of change was in the air and Perestroika was underway, along with the dissolution of the Soviet Union when I was 11. Largely protected from the political and economical stress and fears due to my young age, I could feel the tension through my parents. An only child to my single mom (a very common scenario in the former Soviet countries), I spent numerous hours alone, reading, or drawing, or daydreaming. I would imagine different lives I could live, trying to create worlds beyond my limited understanding I could escape into. I would wonder if people in the United States had cats and dogs for pets, or if they owned some other rare animals instead. I would fantasize about a life I could have , longing for freedom and stability I so desperately lacked.
Reading was my escape from a young age. Immersing myself into other worlds, other characters, trying to walk in someone else’s shoes, feel what they feel, understand life from someone else’s perspective – that became a way to combat both boredom and a sense of profound loneliness. My essays covering Tolstoy’s and Dostoevsky’s characters have apparently become so detailed and in-depth, that my high school literature teacher had suggested I consider writing for a career. Writing seemed boring. It also seemed like a financial suicide. Which a girl whose financial stability has always been in question would not about to undertake. Yet, my thirst for adventure and learning about other people and their world was profound. So, for a minute I considered journalism. That career would suit a clever, sociable, life-loving girl, eager to experience new things, learn about people, and write about that. Then, someone made a comment: “So, what if they send you to Afghanistan to report on that?” The Soviet-Afghan war went on between 1979 and 1989, and while it had ended by the time I was in high school, it was still a war where so many of my older friend’s brothers went to die. Having sent a shiver down my spine, I had realized in that moment that I was no hero, and that journalism would require a dose of courage that I wasn’t ready to put forth.
Hence, the natural choice that I have stumbled upon was to become a psychologist and study the human mind, the human behavior, and to dedicate my life to living through other people – not in the books, but in my sessions. Fixing people also sounded very appealing, given I have failed miserably to fix my parents and save their awful marriage, which has left many scars on my heart and from which I have myself spent numerous therapy sessions recovering from.
So, my fate was set. Given the opportunity to immigrate to the United States at the age of 18 because my father had moved here 6 years prior to avoid religious persecution as a Jew, I took the chance, and became a Ukrainian immigrant living in New York. I will spare you the sad, scary, and hilarious details of what those years were like for a young woman, but suffice to say that eventually I ended up applying to colleges in alphabetical order (I may as well!), from As, to Bs, and so forth. Having only $100 in my pocket and each application costing $30, I was able to apply to Albany, Buffalo, and Binghamton. I got accepted to the SUNY College at Buffalo, where I graduated with a Bachelors degree in psychology and then pursued my PhD in Clinical Psychology from the University at Buffalo. Those who would like to tell me that I shouldn’t complain about the cold and the snow because I grew up in Ukraine and Russia, I’d like to gently offer to shovel a car, completely covered with snow in its entirety, for about two hours, only to discover it wasn’t your car to begin with and was only similar to your car in shape in color! Then we will talk. The lake effect snow is like no other, but the people are warm-hearted and the city will always have a special place in my soul.
Yet, needless to say, when an opportunity came up to conduct my internship in Charleston at MUSC, I eagerly jumped to move. Unlike any other city in America, Charleston has reminded me of my home town Odessa – a Ukrainian port city, with beaches, plentiful seafood, and vacationing people. It felt “mine”. This was now 15 years ago. Having lived here for 15 years with my husband and three terrific and terrifying, but always handsome and kind-hearted boys, I have found a place as close to a home as I could.
An immigrant is always a bit out of place. Not quite an American, not quite a Ukrainian, a citizen of the world, yet a person without a home. It took me years to realize I would have to be the one to fill my own void. My husband couldn’t do it, neither could my kids, or my friends, or my moves, or my job, or my dogs – the list goes on. I would have to do the hard work of coming back to myself, stripping myself of everything I knew I was and wasn’t, everything I thought was important for me, and everything I thought I needed to be happy. And at the end of it, it turned out that my story wasn’t all that important. It turned out that we all have stories, but those stories aren’t us. We live behind the stories, in the eternal, ever-loving presence of our humanness. Thank you for meeting me. Your fellow human.
As you know, we’re big fans of Magid Mindset, LLC. For our readers who might not be as familiar what can you tell them about the brand?
I have now been a practicing therapist for over 20 years, and I can honestly say that other than being with my boys, nothing else gives me as much joy as being in sessions with my clients. After working at MUSC for 10 years, I left in 2017 to start my private practice. My office is located in the old village area of Mount Pleasant, where I see individuals 17 years of age and older for therapy. Originally, coming to specialize in treating addiction, I quickly understood that substance abuse and dependence are simply the tip of the iceberg, covering up deep insecurities, anxiety, depression, relationship issues, grief, trauma, or an internal crisis.
Having done my own work, I know what it’s like to sit on the other side of the couch. Using my expertise and lived experience, my goal for my clients is not only symptom reduction, but a profound shift in their being and worldview. The final goal – is self-discovery and unconditional self-love – a state from which happiness and joy arise naturally and do not require a constant and incessant cultivation, whether through more healthy methods, such as exercise, and diet, or less healthy such as substance use and other forms of numbing and distractions. The journey I take my clients on is not for the faint hearted, but it is a journey towards authenticity and true, unshakable happiness, that is not conditional and does not vary depending on whether you have met your weekly goals or have achieved the next level of success. Through becoming aware of one’s familial and societal conditioning, we begin to realize how much of what we think we are and what we must do to be happy are imply lies and stories told to us by those who were also just scared to live, so they just wanted us to survive. By taking ourselves out of this mental matrix, we can finally break free and live a fulfilling life that is our own, rather than staying in survival mode, avoiding yet the next hypothetical disaster. Happiness is available to each and every one of us, if our most basic needs are met. If you want a permanent relief from suffering, this is the path.
Writing and public speaking have also remained my passions since my teenage years. Thus, in addition to my private practice, I regularly write for the Charleston City paper and the Charleston Moms Magazine. I also deliver workshops and trainings to other treatment providers as well as the community at large (you can find a list of topics on my website or simply contact me directly at drvmagid@gmail.com). I also deliver national talks and seminars on the topics of addiction and recovery, trauma, childhood trauma, parenting, and the general pursuit of happiness. Feel free to follow me on Instagram @dr.magid.psychologist or check out my website and sign up to receive my blog posts. And of course, you are always welcome to shoot me an email with any questions or requests to speak or be a guest writer.
Are there any books, apps, podcasts or blogs that help you do your best?
Some books that have made a profound impact on me and my work are all of Herman Hesse’s books, especially his short story “Iris” (in the Fairy Tales book), I absolutely adore Ram Das, Alan Watts, and Krishnamurti, and please read the Allegory of the Cave by Plato, if you haven’t already.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.viktoriyamagidphd.com
- Instagram: @dr.magid.psychologist
