Today we’d like to introduce you to Shayla Reneé.
Hi Shayla, it’s an honor to have you on the platform. Thanks for taking the time to share your story with us – to start maybe you can share some of your backstory with our readers?
Well, first it is an honor to be interviewed and for that I am truly grateful. I often introduce myself to audiences as a wife, mother, women’s wellness advocate, speaker, Christian life coach, and Amazon #1 bestselling author. But for me, the most important thing is that I identify as a child of God. This is so essential for me because I always struggled with my sense of identity. Although I grew up in a loving family environment, there was also a lot of brokenness and dysfunction in our home — from severe substance abuse, to a house fire, to you name it. When you’re the youngest child in a house with nine family members all sharing one bathroom, you can easily get lost in the sauce. For anyone in the audience who grew up in the ’80s and ’90s like me, just think Kevin McCalister in Home Alone…only 10x more urban [smiles]. Looking back, I can see how a lot of this instability forced me to search for a strong identity in other places.
At first, I thought I found it in the game of basketball. I first learned to dribble at age 7 and it wasn’t long before I was beating the neighborhood boys, playing all-star point guard for my high school team, and flirting with college recruiters. I ate, slept, and breathed the game. Then after a season of uncontrollable weight loss and physical decline in eleventh grade, my dreams of making the WNBA were stripped away completely by a chronic illness. I remember lying exhausted in bed staring at the ceiling asking myself, “If I’m not a basketball player anymore, then who am I?” That question led me into a phase of just, ugh, terrible decisions — partying, drinking, smoking, immoral relationships, all in an attempt to find that one elusive answer.
Finally, at age 23, as a college dropout with a dead-end job and a criminal record, I met this guy who basically swept me off my feet. He was charismatic, attractive, entrepreneurial, and totally…toxic and abusive. He treated me like his personal punching bag for almost five years. Yet I was so consumed with him because I didn’t feel like I had any self-worth, let alone other options. But thankfully, God graciously stepped in and delivered me out of that horrible situation and I haven’t looked back. It involved a long, difficult process of healing and spiritual growth as He eventually taught me that my TRUE Identity can only be found in Jesus Christ. My life has never been the same since. Today I enjoy the privilege of using my life story to empower other women to overcome toxic thoughts, feelings, people, and situations through faith in Christ so they will hopefully learn the lesson I wish I understood decades ago: Know who you are…before it’s too late!
Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way. Looking back, would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?
Wow, if only that were true. Between a rare cancerous genetic disorder, a childhood spent in the dangerous urban streets of Coatesville, PA, the tragic early loss of both parents, and my own struggles with substance abuse, depression, domestic violence, legal trouble, and more, my life journey just always seemed to bring more problems than answers. I think a lot of people can relate to that. But the pain of my past could never define me. Just like it doesn’t define you, or anyone else who might see this interview in the future, if you don’t let it. It can become the fuel that drives you to discover the inner strength and purpose you can have through faith in Christ.
Just to give you an example, since I mentioned losing my mom early. She was the strongest woman I ever knew, worked as a CNA for 30 years, mostly nightshift, almost never missed seeing my basketball games or my brother’s track and field tournaments, always actively serving our church and community, the whole nine. Within that first year of my relationship with my ex, she had stage four breast cancer. But I was so desperate, so caught up in his web, so hopelessly lost that I chose to be with him instead of spending precious quality time with my mother who died later that same year. Mind you, all this was after he had started physically abusing me and then he never bothered to attend her funeral with me because he “had to work.” So our family had already lost my dad, then my mom, and now at my lowest point…I was losing myself.
It was such a painful struggle that even years after my relationship with him ended, I needed to purge and heal on the inside. This is what led me to write my first book, HE ALMOST STOLE MY LIFE. It started off as just a long journal and the process of just writing it all out was very therapeutic. The book was eventually revised and became an Amazon #1 bestseller because it unpacks my story in such a way that gives other struggling women some language, tools, and strategies for coping and healing so that they, too, can thrive as the precious royal daughters of Christ the King that God created them to be.
Thanks – so what else should our readers know about Shayla Reneé?
In John 10:10, Jesus said, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” So our brand is all about helping people overcome toxic thoughts, feelings, people, and situations that are destroying their lives and sabotaging their ability to thrive as God intended. With nearly two decades of personal, professional, and ministry experience, we specialize in helping other women pinpoint spiritual and emotional roadblocks, change their self-sabotaging inner dialogue, exchange unhealthy for healthy coping mechanisms, set and achieve consequential goals, and boldly embrace their TRUE Identity as precious royal daughters of Christ our King. We achieve this through best-selling books, as well as “Shay’s Corner” inspirational blog, the “Take Back Your Life: Conversations with Shay” podcast, and the Take Back Your Life Women’s Empowerment Program. We’re actually prepping today to do TBYL as a 12-week impact experience for a wonderful group of female residents in a large housing ministry program here in the Greenville area coming up shortly. Really exciting!
I think the thing I’m most proud of as far as my business is that I get to do it with my husband John and our son. It’s been a long and difficult journey, and I couldn’t have made it here without them. John in particular has been so consistent and supportive, not just in terms of believing in me, but also encouraging me from the very beginning when I thought about writing my first book, and now standing in my corner as my brand manager.
How do you think about happiness?
Since I tend to be a pessimist, it’s actually very healthy for me to take inventory of the things that make me happy. I have met famous people, traveled the world, built a personal brand, but as I grow older, I realize that it’s the little things that make me smile — like laughing at a joke with my husband and 6-year-old son, until one of us continues to repeat the same line of the joke until it becomes stale and annoys the mess out of the other two [smiles]!
Then there’s our bedtime routine when we have family prayer and devotion. Watching my son listen so intently to Bible stories, engaging, and asking questions warms my heart. This is when I tend to see God working the most, through our son who loves God with all his heart and yearns to learn more about Him. After losing so many of my close loved ones, having a healthy family makes me happy.
I am also happy to see the underdog succeed. Someone who may be getting hit hard by life, but battles through until they begin to thrive and win. This is why I love mentoring and coaching women. I get to be a living example for them to see what it’s like to be on the other side of the pain and toxicity — still not perfect, but becoming more like Jesus every day — which fuels their hope. In the end, it is important for me to choose happiness, even when I have moments of despair. In these moments I am reminded of the grace and mercy of God, His promises, and the little things that make me smile.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.ShaylaInspires.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ShaylaInspires
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ShaylaInspires
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@ShaylaInspires
- Spotify: https://anchor.fm/ShaylaInspires
- Store: https://shaylarenee.square.site
- Other: https://www.ShaylaInspires.com/booking
